Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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