Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize