hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize