At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize