In the future we'll all be gay
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
