i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
We were destined to go to rehab together
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
