do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
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