I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
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