ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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