hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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