can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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