hotties wanna shake it
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
I need to stop coming to work sober
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"