I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
was it more than 30 minutes?
then you're in a relationship
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Sex on roller skates
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?