He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Randomize
