there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize