If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
