My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
