4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize
