we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Randomize
