i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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