woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
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Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
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There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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