umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.