matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
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No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
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Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.