garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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