my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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