ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Randomize
