Dual....:-)
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
i think my cat just said my name.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
