I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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