I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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