And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
