Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
i've created a new STD.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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