sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
