This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
