so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I woke up under a house in Key West
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