The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
i think i just naturally attract stoners
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
