Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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