Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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