Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
