I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
is it fun? or sober?
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