I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
