garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
