Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
