I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
