turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
