it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
