Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
She bit a glass in half.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
