I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Randomize
