Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
