OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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