You smell like stripper and shame
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
