we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize