she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude